


Nobody but Him

by OnTheGround2012



Series: Stream of consciousness in 5 episodes [4]
Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Acceptance, Emotions, Episode Related, Fluff, Internal Monologue, Kissing, M/M, Realization, Romance, Self-Acceptance, Stream of Consciousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-30
Updated: 2016-11-30
Packaged: 2018-09-03 09:43:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8707414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnTheGround2012/pseuds/OnTheGround2012
Summary: Lukas's feelings in the barn scene (1.07)





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is my fourth fic for Eyewitness after ["You're Not This Guy"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8486389) (1.01), ["In Another World"](http://archiveofourown.org/chapters/19329193) (1.03) and ["Everything You Wanted"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8632531) (1.06).
> 
> This scene is so amazing and perfect that I'm not sure that even a good writer could make it justice and l'm not a writer, so yeah, I don't think I made it justice. Besides, this is only my third time writing in the second person which is very complex, so it's not what I usually do.
> 
> Anyway, this kind of fic is quite personal because it's how I see Lukas, so I can't expect other people to agree with me.

                                                          

 

 

You've been waiting all day.

Waiting all day to tell him that you broke up with Rose.

Waiting to be alone with him again.

Waiting to kiss him like you did yesterday.

So you tell him and you kiss him and he kisses you back like he always does, only this time, he seems so much happier. There's something different about the way he's kissing you since yesterday.

Like he's not holding anything back.

Like he knows you're never pushing him away again.

Like he knows he can be in control if he wants.

Like he knows you'll let him do everything he wants because now _you_ know what you want.

You made that absolutely clear when you brought Helen the gun and he knows that.

He wants you to swear that you are not lying. And he shouldn't be asking you that but he thinks you lie all the time and yeah, maybe you do... maybe you've not stopped doing that since that day you kissed him for the first time.

Maybe you've treated him like shit too many times but you don't think you've ever really lied to him and he should know that.

Because he's the only one you can be honest with.

So you swear again that you broke up with her and this time he seems to believe you because he asks you what she said.

You don't feel like repeating all the shit she said.

 _She said that she never liked me anyway._ You say instead.

He knows it's bullshit, so he snorts and you both laugh and he slaps you playfully and you are happy you made him smile.

Then you find out he got film for the camera you got him and you don't like pictures, at least not when you are the subject, so you cover your face but he points it at you and it's too late. He takes it anyway.

 _That's a classic._ You say. Because it is. But you pull it out and you ask how this thing works.

 _You just got to watch it develop for, like, thirty seconds._ He says. And thirty seconds feel like a long time right now.

You don't feel like waiting that long. Besides, he's back next to you and you put your arm around his shoulder as you count the seconds.

 _Shut up._ He says.

And you can't stop the smile on your face because this light totally suits him and he's the most gorgeous thing you've ever seen and you want to kiss him every chance you have and so you do it. Close to his ear, something you never felt like doing with Rose. But then again, you never were in a barn with Rose. There was never any pain in your stomach with her. So when he asks you why you did it, the answer couldn't be any easier or more honest.

 _'Cause I don't want a girlfriend._ You say.

And the way he smiles at you... fuck, he's happy. He's really happy. Because he knows it's true and he knows exactly what you mean. You don't need to say it and that's good.

You came forward with the gun and your part of the truth because they were taking him away.

You did it because you want him here. Next to you. Like right now.

He's all you want and that's exactly why you broke up with her. Because you were done with lying to her. And you were done with hurting the only person that really matters to you.

And when he smiles you know he gets that. You know he's proud of you and that makes you feel good.

Because, like you told his mom, loving him the way you do out here is hard but it's even harder staying away from him.

You just can't imagine losing him.

You're not sure what's going to happen but you're done with losing time.

You're done with keeping Philip away.

You're done with having a girlfriend who means nothing to you.

You're done with being a coward.

From now on you're with him. And you're not letting him go.

He grabs his phone and gives you a set of earphones.

_It's a little surprise. I made us a playlist._

It's not only the way he says it. It's the fact that he did it thinking about you what totally warms you heart.

Nobody has ever made you a playlist.

Nobody has ever made a silly video that is the cutest thing you have on your phone.

Nobody has ever forgiven you so many times.

Nobody has ever lied for you.

Nobody but him.

And you're never forgetting that again.

Your arm rests over his shoulder and he's back lying against you and it feels unreal how perfect he feels in your arms.

It feels like the place you're supposed to be.

It feels like this is what you've been waiting for.

It feels like this is where he belongs.

So you kiss his head just because you can before closing you eyes.

Music and peace as you hold him close, and if you ever doubted what perfection feels like, now you don't anymore.

Now you know.

You run your right hand along his arm and somehow it keeps you calm because it makes this real.

Because you know he's still here.

Because you know he's not going anywhere.

Because you know he's safe.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for checking it. If you wanna say hi on Tumblr, I'm [otg2012](http://otg2012.tumblr.com/).
> 
> It would be lovely to have some feedback.


End file.
